26th Nov 2008 - Wednesday - Sunny but start raining at night

I was so annoyed as my printer always malfunction at the very very moment..
I have to pass up my PED (Assignment), and was printing out my work after compilation at the very last minute..
Anyway, it was considered punctual. The time to pass it up was 4-5pm, and we reach college on 5pm sharp.
Trying to settle everything earlier, but... It's really difficult to change the attitude.
Let it be...

The frustration raised in me and made me lost the mood to attend the night lecture and i skipped the lecture at last.. ^^
1st, I went to McD to buy Moto Moto, and... i cant get it, anyway i get Julien finally..
After that, we heading towards Pavillion for our main course.. hahahahaa!!! Ichiban Boshi..
A very very nice sushi restaurant...


Hehee, can u see the thickness of the salmon sashimi??? I love it so much....
It is really difficult to describe the happiness when put it into my mouth by words....
And, today... finally i had my tuna sashimi as well...
I just want some nice food, nice place to release my bad mood... >.<

After the meal, we went for a window shopping... Christmas is coming....
It's so beautiful... Anyway, i prefer the previous christmas decoration which theme is white color..


Guess... What it is.... hahaa!!! It is a cake.... I saw it in one of the cake house in Pavillion, i think it is Olive Tree... Forgotten!
Nice... Wish to have one during christmas to enhance the circumstance..

After that, for sure we had a movie - 武术 (Wu Shu) - it's wednesday wor, so only RM8 in Pavillion... hahaa!!!
Em, quite nice.. And dont know why, i feel quite touching... Not just fighting, but it tells some moral values as well..
I thought i can go home after the movie, and my friends said... It's yet to be 11pm..
Anyway, i pay the parking ticket as well.....
And... It was still have traffic jam.... So..... I turn another way and heading toward Times Square.
[My friends suggested to play bowling] Then, we really purposely went to play bowling.. hahaa!!

After the bowling, we still go for another station :: McD again, just to get Moto Moto...
Anyway, still failed.. So each of us have one Sundae ice cream, and we were chit chatting there and planning for tmr's activity...
Finally, we go home... Hahahaa~

Actually, i really enjoy with such activities.. And, normally we do according to the mood, we dont plan.. Most of our planning failed!! Hahaa..
Like 2 weeks ago, we had a gathering with diploma classmates.. It was an enjoyable day..


And.. last week, i wanted to buy my bus ticket... So i went to Puduraya...
After that, since we went out for lunch, and being waiting for hours to have the lunch...
Then, we went to Times Square to eat lamb chop in Gasoline..

my mushroom lamb chop, as i was having flu... that's why i ordered mushroom sauce..
And, i dont dare to eat the fries, as i worry it will worsen my sickness.... So..... It became.....

Hahaa, my days so enjoyable n exciting right?!
Actually, being used to it sometimes, with the gang around...

my Weekend at home

When i said, i'm going home this weekend, my classmatesss asked me, AGAIN???!!!!!
Yup.. ^^ but i really wanna go home.. As most likely, i'm not coming home during December due to the tight schedule. So... ~

After being home for few days, em.... about 3 days lar... Still not enough, but it is the time to back to KL... It seems like i dint do a lot of thing, just done a little part of them...
Anyway, this time i have time to discuss sth with my mum.. Unlike to the last 2 times, back home for only few hours...
Up to today, the flu n coughing have been continuing for one week d.. Still almost the same, but it does get better anyway... Hope to get well soon...
Anyway, even in home town, i still have to rush for my assignment PED.. haihz... I finished one part, then tonight have to continue with the theory part..
I'm still the same, i thought i can... but still have to postpone the progress until the 11th hour. Aiks*
It seems like i have to do a lot of thing after going back to KL.. Contract Admin, Prodex, Interviews, Project Management, Thesis..... I really so scare...

Em, anyway i'm quite happy with this weekend 'vacation'.. Even i dint really rest in home, going out with friends n family... But still consider not too bad...
The new wing of Gurney quite disappointing.. or maybe i should have a proper shopping there before make any judgment.
Only managed to meet up with jui, sotong n mimi... hhmmmm.... okokk lor~
Still dont meet up with teh ping even i'm the earliest to say to meet him... but but but.....!!!
And, i have dyed my hair.. i'm quite happy with the color.. quite natural... hahahhahahahaa :D
will post the pic next time...

K,it's time for me to leave... my bus to KL on 1220...

15 Nov 2008, Saturday

今天，终于可以早起身。但是，由于屋友也同样早课，而厕所只有一个，最后，我还是迟到了。我不知道我的迟到是否引起朋友的不满，可以我就是不想问，不想知道。
在讲堂里，我好像没学到什么东西。就是朦朦胧胧，结束了。终于，我也应该是拥有完整的笔记了。呵呵。
其实，不是睡不醒，只是，我觉得很不舒服。喉咙又开始痛了，应该有发热气，持续了好几个星期。断断续续地。
上完课，跟几个同学吃早餐。其实是为了渡过那一个小时。因为我要去访问一家发展商的Project Manager. 老实说，很抱歉，我没有准备。没有紧张的心情，心跳没有加速。。。。很自然地走进去。我还以为，访问会以英文为主，怎知，是一段华语的对话。然而，还好，至少我都知道他想要表达的。将它们翻译为英文应该不难。
访问总共进行了大约45分钟吧。访问中，我也得到了一些我在报纸上没看过的东西，很高兴。访问结束后，他问了我一些关于我的论文的东西，就聊了一会儿。
出来时，我真的很高兴，无比的兴奋。这是我没想过的。哈哈！！
回到家里，整理我的房间，扫一扫地上。上网，然后最终抵不过周公的呼唤，睡着了。
醒来时，还是继续留连网上。第一次觉得Facebook还挺不错，忽然想在那里上传一些照片，可是连续几次的当机，还是放弃了。

一个人的下午，很安静。外头偶尔飘着细雨，天空阴沉沉。然而，我一点都不觉得自己是寂寞的。很享受这一个下午。很舒服。
一个人不孤单，两个人更寂寞。
找不到知音时，这句话便得派上用场。

忽然，好像看书。还是拿出了之前只看了一章的《勇敢抉择》。今天，第二章的题目是 - 异乡人
从中，我想跟大家分享一些。

• 如果我们不能选择自己的处境，至少可以决定自己的对策；不能选择自己的出身，至少可以选择自己的人生目标，放弃选择也就意味着走向死亡。
• 过了大一大二，到了大三大四，考虑人生方向的压力越来越大。说老实话，我当时真的一筹莫展。因为此前我人生的时光都花在了取悦父母和考高分上了。做到这两件事其实很简单，但是除此以外，我并没有考虑过自己的人生方向。我对很多事情都感兴趣，曾经有一段时间，我一会儿想当个消防员，一会儿又想当个舞蹈家，无法确定人生的轨迹。父母对我的每个理想都予以鼓励。其实做什么无所谓，关键是一旦作出了选择，就要把它做到完美，愿意付出热情，并且自动自发地为之奉献。父母一生经历了重重艰险，他们不怕我走上和他们一样的人生道路，一直希望我能为一个目标投入全部身心，而这个目标也值得我奉献自己的才华和热情。
• 我曾经想过当个职业音乐家。但是，长久以来，我明白了尽管我热爱音乐，但是我忍受不了作为音乐家必须承受的孤独。不仅如此，谁能断定我就一定具有音乐家的才华呢？
• 我每天都头疼得要命，几个月都睡不好觉。父亲到学校看我时，我告诉他我讨厌法律。他很担忧，但是他不想让我就此放弃。在他看来，放弃意味着失败，你必须坚持到底，不管处境有多么艰难。尽管我打算告诉他我想离开法学院，但是话到了嘴边还是没有说出来。我有在学校坚持了一个月。
• 如果我想发挥能力和天赋，实现自己的理想蓝图，就必须找到能让我为之投入全部脑力和心理的东西。生活是属于我自己的，我可以做任何自己喜欢的事

看完了，最后自己煮了面线来吃。一边吃，一边看《冰天动地》。一个TVB为了台庆而制作的节目。叙述冰川的融化，地球的暖化。
我觉得是一个很值得观看的节目，因为真的可以从中学习。
当中有一些大学教授/研究者的访问。其实，很早以前我就有想过，我要修读一科关于怎样运用环保在建筑的过程，一些关于环保建筑物的东西。
然而，我真的不敢告诉我的父母，我想，他们会杀了我。
但是，如果日后我找到相关的资料，或许我会自助进修。毕竟马来西亚，真的没有这东西，或者是很少运用，因为那昂贵的费用。
其实，还没选论文题目时，我想写一篇这样的论文。后来，因为很多人都在写Green Building, 而且我也找不到我想要的东西。我要的不是Green Building, 是将环保与建筑物联系起来。所以，最终放弃了。

原本想在今天将今早的访问写出来，现在放弃了。因为我想看书。^^
其实，我最期待的工作，便是杂志社里，访问一些人，然后将访问写成文章。然后放入一些照片，受访者随性的照片。最后，写一写我自己的感想。
现在的我，应该没什么勇气转行。^^

天空

这两天，又开始下起雨来。自从与朋友从槟城回来。

心想 ：还好我们结束了我们的旅程。
埋怨 ：为什么一直下雨？
大热天的时候，我们总是埋怨，好热好热。
却忘了，我们常年都保持在这样的气温。
一些国家，比我们更热
我们说 ：就快中暑了。说了那么多次，什么时候是真的中暑？！

今天临上课前一个小时，天空开始下起雨来。
喜欢我的房间，因为有窗口，还有街景。
只是偶尔，在下雨时，来不及关窗时，雨会飘进来。
偶尔，看看窗外，喧哗的街道；寂静无人的街道。。。

通常，我起身的时候，已经是中午时分。
偶尔看见窗外晴空万里，心情也会很愉快。
我，很喜欢蓝天白云。
它让我觉得很舒服，好像昨日的烦恼，也抛到万里之外
我什么都忘记了。
睡觉时，我都不会关窗，因为我比较喜欢流畅的空气。
还有，最主要的原因，我希望我可以在太阳升起时，
我也可以起身。
虽然，很难。
因为我一定可以躲过阳光，钻进被窝里。
可是，我的房间是西斜。
太阳快下山时，很热、很晒。

偶尔，我可以看见很美很美的夕阳。
红红的火球，渐渐往下掉。
很多时候，我都很想拍下。
可是手机的相机功能有限。
遗憾
偶尔，我可以看到被渲染成橙红色的天空
我真的觉得，很舒服。

不知道什么时候开始，我开始喜欢瞭望天空
凝望海洋（当然这不能常坐）
那无尽的宽阔，让我迷恋
或许
我真的太眷恋 自由
根本不想被任何人夺掠

我也很喜欢星空，还有月圆之夜。
星星和月亮，好像离我好远。
黑暗中的一点明亮

天空
嗯
还有雨后的彩虹
很久没看到彩虹了
希望，有一天我可以在这里看到
我的房间，A-21-12

写于，一个失眠的夜晚
或许，背后真的很痛
床已经走形了，不能支撑我

囍帖街

歌手：谢安琪

忘掉种过的花 重新的出发 放弃理想吧
别再看 尘封的喜帖 你正在要搬家

筑得起 人应该接受 都有日倒下
其实没有一种安稳快乐 永远也不差
就似这一区 曾经称得上 美满甲天下
但霎眼 全街的单位 快要住满乌鸦
好景不会与日常在 天梯不可只往上爬
爱的人 没有一生一世吗 大概不需要害怕

忘掉爱过的他 当初的喜帖金箔印着那位他
裱起婚纱照那道墙及一切美丽旧年华 明日同步拆下

忘掉有过的家 小餐枱沙发雪柜及两份红茶
温馨的光境不过借出到期拿回吗 等不到下一代 是吗

忘掉砌过的沙 回忆的堡垒
剎那已倒下 面对这 坟起的荒土 你注定学会潇洒
阶砖不会拒绝磨蚀 窗花不可幽禁落霞
有感情 就会一生一世吗 又再惋惜有用吗

忘掉爱过的他 当初的喜帖金箔印着那位他
裱起婚纱照那道墙及一切美丽旧年华 明日同步拆下

忘掉有过的家 小餐枱沙发雪柜及两份红茶
温馨的光境不过借出到期拿回吗

终须会时辰到 别怕 请放下手里那锁匙 好吗

---------------------------------------------------------------

I listened for this song for quite some time ago, and yet...

i used to listen and dont read to its lyrics..

Today, sudd i read to the lyrics... and i think....

囍帖街 is a street in HK which doing couples wedding invitation card and everyone went there when they are going to tie their knot.

Due to civilisation and development, there are a lot of refurbishment on the old buildings. Developers buy the old buildings and redevelop the building into a new place and changed its original facade.. When there is no more empty land for development

Then the place might be another place to hang out for the citizen, as a new landmark of the place..

Actually, it is quite sad to have this happen. I would rather the developer or the state government to redevelop the place and keep its origin so that our citizens, the next generations would have the chance to learn and know the history, the development of the place.

But, developers still a businessman who want and have to earn money.

The world still growing...

Rest ends, Work starts

I'm back!! I just put down my thing.. Feel nice, but bit of tiring as i had been sitting in the car for about 6-7 hours. Even i'm the one who was sleeping...

It wasnt a party,but a lunch having together with my family memberssss.... including all my uncles,aunts, and cousinsss..... hahahaa!! Quite nice the food, but i dint really eat much as felt quite full.

I did nothing at home,just watching TVB anniversary programmes with my siblings. I dint even chat with my parents even i wanna discuss with my mum should i buy the digital camera now.. Thinking...~ Mega sale coming lo~~ Hohohohoo...* 29th Nov

Actually after the Penang trip with my classmates, sth strange happen. One of my gal friend suddenly get angry with the whole world. I was trying to talk to her, but nth get into her mind. Since then, i wont have the patient to do more than that. So i continue my days, relaxing.. Resting as i felt so tired after driving all the way from KL-Penang-KL..
Suddenly,i'm being complained.. She told my friend that i dint help her in the assignment and let her finish all the thing. My Gosh, this is my 1st time being complained. That feeling, terribly bad. Actually, i told her not to do and have a rest before continue.. She said, she slept a lot in the car so try to do sth now.. Well,i cant stop her... End up.......

Ok,fine... Since then, i finished my rest now,and.. i will work as hard as i can throughout the week. Finish everything for her, and.. i also wan to do my own thesis as well...!!
I will do that!!! Turn into a new leaf after being re-charged.

回家

4点多，我刚刚回到家里。原本想出去放松，结束整个星期的凌乱，怎知，是另一个故事的开始。
无聊，我真的觉得无聊。或许，大吵一场，真的可以解决问题。

虽然，应该睡觉了，可是... 就想继续，写一写我的感受。
我已经一个月没回家了，我想是逃避。逃避之前的恐惧感。
一个星期与家人的旅行，压迫感的余悸，持续至今。
一直到上个星期，我带同学回家玩，我才发现，我开始想家了。
这个星期，我们会为婆婆庆祝生日。所以，我一定会回家。
我的心情，无比的兴奋，好像很久都没有回家

希望，一切都会过得很好。
在家，不会拥有外头的压力，我可以忘记一切。
我要好好地休息。

Stories of Mine · 我的所见所闻

HHhhoooOOoohoooooOOoo~
Finally my new blog being set up!!!
I'm quite satisfy this time as i can add in all the features that i like..
and so the song..
Everytime when i have insomnia, i would have to listen to this song
Everytime when i'm too tension, i would have to listen to this song
Everytime when i'm too upset, i would have to listen to this song
This is a song from a TVB drama, and this is the beginning part of the song..
Sth would really bring my mind to the broad field, greenish, windy, and most importantly, relaxing!!
I shift from my old blog to here as i think Blogspot really provide a better service and, it works faster than my old blog... blog.com
Hopefully it can really satisfy and fulfill all my needs and requirements....
Anyway, this time i have invited some of my friends.... and this is actually a private blog and only opened for invited personnel...

^^ All the best to u guys

梦

这一个早晨，天气晴朗，一屋子的人都在为自己的事情忙碌。
终于，新郎到了，他来迎娶今天出嫁的阿姨。
经过一番的礼仪，新郎终于启程，把阿姨去回去了。
我也随着兄弟们，浩浩荡荡走了。
转眼间，我回到了我的家。那家的规模挺大，是角头间。
忽然，屋外大棚了，棚里挂了一切旗帜。
我以为我去错了家，可是不是，所以硬着头皮走进去
我被通知，婆婆去世了，爸爸也去世了。
就几分钟后。。。。
我，我，我......... 该怎样反应？？

**********************************************************

这是几天前我做的一个梦，恶梦。
醒来以后，我很怕，很想打回家，可是。。我不想告诉妈妈，我有这样的一个梦
害怕的感觉，一直持续，还好后来跟朋友说了梦，希望梦，不会发生。
因为，其实叔叔就要结婚了，我不要！！
我知道，婆婆最后的心愿就是看到最后一个儿子，成家立室
因此，今天向把这个梦再写出来。
不是迷信，就是宁可信其有，不可信其无。^^

我真的觉得自己的朋友少了

记得以前有一位朋友曾经这样说过 “我以为我上到advanced diploma，朋友就会越来越少，怎知还是有很多喝茶的机会”
现在，我想说，恭喜他。因为我的人缘不如他。
不知道为什么，我真的觉得自己的朋友少了。每次见面，废话连篇时，都是那一些人。我觉得自己无聊，但是一个人时，更无聊，更寂寞。
挂在网上一整天，只是跟几个人，寒暄几句，我没有很认真地想聊。
我好像没有了朋友。在朋友栏上，来来回回，无数次的重复，还是没有结果。
最后的最后，我看到了我的pendrive..
我想起，我有戏可以看。珠光宝气。
虽然没有太高的期望，但还是想看。或许，期望低了，换来的会是惊喜。
多么希望可以一直看到我睡着了时...
结束了。
没了。

Sunday,October 26, 2008 : Written

想要谈恋爱，只是，对的人，在何方？！

其实很多时候，我都不明白为什么朋友会跟某某人开始一段所谓的恋情。或许我赞成、反对，但是无论如何，我都不会出声，因为我觉得，这始终不是我的事情，我是局外人，我惟有祝福。衷心地。因为我觉得，或许他们可以修成正果。
为什么我会不明白？！或许对于爱情，少了那一份应该要有的不理智。我，或许太理智了；或许，太现实。
我想要的，绝对不止是一段开心的爱情。这段爱情当中，还包括很多很多。我觉得，我想要的，在这阶段，他们都无法给我，所以，在我眼中，没有所谓的他。他们，都只是我的朋友。
爱情，已经不再只是单纯的喜欢。还有对方的性格、习惯，生活上的细节，经济能力，... ... 最后，还有对方的家人。爱屋及乌，真的这么容易？呵呵 ^^ (我不觉得这是挑剔，因为我没有要求对方改变，就只是希望，我喜欢的，是原本的对方)
我眼看朋友，一个又一个都有了另一半。以前，我从来都不羡慕，因为我觉得，他们。。还不是一个可靠的‘男人’。（或许我心里，也渴望一段细水长流的爱情）
除此以外，我觉得，我还没有准备跟他一起分享我的生活。当两个人在一起的时候，其实很多事情都应该一起经历，一起玩乐、哭泣等。当两个人在一起，却过着各自的生活，好像缺少了什么似的。
我太喜欢自由自在的生活了，我很害怕别人对我的约束。当我想出去时，即使家人我都不喜欢交待，反正就是附近，很快我就会回来。我明白交待的原因，但是我就是很讨厌这东西。所以。。。
其实，我个人觉得，现在真爱越来越难找了。看见朋友分分离离，觉得爱情好像已经失去了当初的意义。两个人在一起，不需要理由；分开时，也可以敷衍了事。

最近开始真正一个人的生活，我自己一个人住。很多时候，我其实很害怕喧闹以后的落寞。那安静的可怕的气氛，偶尔，真的无从适应。然而，我还是享受自己一个人的时候。
假期结束前，跟家人旅行去了。那在一起的几天里，很开心。可是，那一刻我明白，我缺少了属于自己的那一块。当假期结束，回到自己的空间时，我如释重放。在最后一刻，我才知晓。

我不太清楚，我想要怎样的他。但是我希望在一起的日子，是互相依靠、扶持，不是任何一方照顾对方。爱情是需要两个50分的人去完成的任务。
想要谈恋爱，不是最近的事情。念头出现了一段时间，只是，对的人，在何方？！
也许，知道自己年事渐高。因此开始想要物色一个可以跟自己相伴的人。可是，谈何容易！
越来越多人问"有男朋友吗?";"那是你的男朋友啊？";".......男朋友......."
我从来都不会认真回答这样的问题，只有最亲近的朋友清楚知道我的状况。不想多加解释，因为我觉得这始终是我自己的事情。当一切确定以后再向大家公布，也还不迟。

*后记 : 在一个不想睡的凌晨，写下了自己的想法、看法。没有任何的原因。一直以来都很想写下，只是不懂得整理，所以都没有写下。只是一个记录，我曾经是这么想。